A Beautiful Picture

Here's another beautiful picture from the Bahamas....a sunset in Port Lucaya.

Happy Birthday Sis!!

This post is decidated to my sister cause today is her birthday. Let me just say first how amazing i think my sister is. She's been through soo much but she still keeps going. I think the world of her and she is one of my heroes.

So Sarah, i hope you have a wonderful special day today!! And i pray that this next year will be filled with lots of blessings! I love you so very much!

Cruisin in the Bahamas

So you thought my Bahamas posts were over?? Well i took too many pictures..and my mom says that i don't have a good picture of her up yet. Even though i think the ones that i have up are good of her. but anyway these picture are from the 2 cruises we went on.

the first one took us out to the reef and was called a "semi sub". When we got out to the reef, we went downstairs and could see the reef and all the fish. I didn't take my camera down there cause i forgot...but the fish were beautiful. So after about 20mins, we went back up and went snorkeling. this was my first time trying to snorkel and i was sooo scared. For one reason...i was going to be in the ocean ( i don't like swimming in the ocean), and another reason you're surround by fish. Well i tried to snorkel but couldn't get the hang of it...forunatley the were literally surrounded you so you didn't have to have your face underwater to see them. The funny thing was everytime i would moved, i would hit a fish.

I'm enjoying the cruise.


the next day we went on another cruise and this time we saw all the million dollar homes that were on canals. I've never seen so many huge beautiful homes before. AFter we saw the homes we out to the ocean and our guide dove for sanddollars.

What a week

Okay so this week has been soo crazy. Monday was realitivly calm... excited to report. Then that night it was very hard to sleep cause i was nervous about my surgery that was going to happen the next day. So i think i slept like three hours or something. Then on tuesday was my surgery. And incase someone is reading this who has no idea what i'm talking about i'll explain later on in the post. I was more nervous then i was the night before. But a couple of my friends called and talking to them helped me ALOT. One of the them was made me laugh alot.

So my mom picked me up and off to the hospital we went. We got to the hospital and they brought me up to where they were going to prep me. All the nurses and doctors were super nice and that really helps when you're nervous. It took them awhile to prep me ..i had to have an IV...an EKG done...and they had to do the EKG a few times cause something wasn't working right. After all that they brought me down to the where i was gonna have the surgery. I don't really remember that much because they ended up giving me a lot of happy juice. I just remember them getting everything ready before my dr came in...then they gave me the happy juice..so after that everything else was a blur. The surgery went well... my dr put in the reveal loop recorder that will be monitoring my heart..with no problems that i know about.

So after that i was brought to the recovery room..which again was a blur. I just remember that i was in alot of pain more pain then i thought i would be. It felt like someone hit me full force with a brick or something heavy like that. I think even the nurse was surprised that i was hurting that much. But she was great and gave me oxycodone to help...which helps but makes me very loopy.

So now i'm recovering and i'm still in pain. I had an okay day yesterday so the pain wasn't so bad..just sore. I actually made it to church last night. And today i started off feeling pretty good just tired from the pain meds. And i went to my sister's to have lunch with my nephews at Riley's bday party. I felt alright while i was there but after we left we had to stop at a few places and then were goign to go out to eat. And the pain started to come back So since 4pm i've been in alot of pain...it almost feels like the pain i was in on tuesday.

So now i'm just laying in my bed writing this, listenign to a podcast. Trying to stay awake for a little while longer. that's the excitement for this week...next week I'll be going back for a follow up appointment and they'll take the dressing off and do all the other fun stuff.

Fun at the Harbour Room

well it's been a few weeks since i've been back from the Bahamas and yes i'm still blogging about it. I took alot of pictures and the trip was just too much fun, not to. We found this really nice resturant in Port Lucaya, called the Harbour Room. It was one of the best resturants i think i've ever been to. They had really good food and the service was awesome. Our waiter, whose name was Perry was definately one of a kind. First of all he totally took care of us and went the extra mile every time we were there. And on top of all that good stuff..he was really funny and went around singing "oldies". So here's a few pictures from one of the nights we were there.

Being silly in the Bahamas

While we were in the Bahamas i was constantly keeping my eyes open for a great silly picture opportunties....and they're were plenty on this trip. So here are my favorites.

"Help me...I'm trapped in an old phone booth!!"


Who should i call??


Here's my new friend...Mr Nutcracker...we met at the Harbour Room


Here's me trying to be a diva


The shark's gonna get me....ahhh!

More pool pics

I wanted to put these in my last post but it was getting too long so here are some more pool pics...

Bahamas... the pool

One of the best parts of the resort that we stayed at was the pool. I've never seen a pool this beautiful and so huge. So this post is devoted to the pool.

This is one of the two bridges that went over the pool. And all the landscapeing and flowers, palm trees...made you feel like you were in a rain forest or something.
The pool has these caves..each one had a jaqcuzzi inside...it was really cool. And there were also alot of waterfalls. So to get in some of the cave you had to under them...so much fun.
And there was this one huge cave that they had a pool bar inside. You could either swim up to it or if you didn't want to get in the pool or wet ( that would be no fun) you could walk in on the dry side. One day we swam up to the bar and ordered chicken strips and pina coladas...it was soo much fun

Here's the "dry side" entrance to the bar....soo pretty. And also they had a going around the cave that the bar was in. I think that besides laying in the hammock...the waterslide was my favorite thing to do. I had a close encounter with a lizard on one of my trips down...i was about half way down and there was this lizard inside the waterslide and i was headed straight towards it for speed ahead and there was nothing i could do....so i screamed and hoped i wouldn't touch it.

Bahamas....My New Favorite Place

Well I've been back from my incredible vacation for almost a week now....it's hard to believe. I took alot of pics and have alot to say so this will be the first of many posts about vacation. I really love the Bahamas so much that i've decided that it's my new favorite place. Just look at how beautiful it is??? Don't you just want to go relax in one of those chairs and enjoy the view??? i know i wouldn't mind hopping on a plane right now and go hideout there for another week. For the most of the time the weather there was great, except that it was extremely hot and humid...and on a our last night it thunderstormed really bad...looked like a hurricane was coming through. It took awhile for me to get used to the heat.

We had a direct flight to Freeport (Bahamas), so it only took a few hours to get there. Once we got there we had most of the day left to enjoyed. While we were waiting to check in our resort we went the resturant that's on the beach and had Bahama Mama's( no alcholic) and some snacks. We just sat there and enjoyed the sight of the palm trees and the ocean. I couldn't believe that we were really there.

After we were all checked in and settled we walked around the resort to explore and i discovered this wonderful hammock by the pool. It was in the perfect spot...beneath two palm trees and right by the edge of the pool. I love hammocks!!!! Later on we went took the water ferry over to Port Lucaya...had dinner at the Harbour Room (which i'll write about later) and walked around.

My Puppy in the Bahamas

So you're probably wondering what in the world I'm talking about. Well a few years ago my wonderful nephews, Riley and Reagan got me a puppy stuff animal for my birthday. I asked Reagan what i should name it and he said "Puppy". So her name is Puppy. Anyway i thought it would be fun to bring her with me on my vacation to the Bahamas and take pictures of her doing different things. So Riley and Reagan this post is especially for you and i hope you enjoy the pictures. And for everyone else incase you're wondering, i'll be posting some pictures and stuff from the bahamas soon...the next on my list. So here we go...

Here is Puppy getting ready to enjoy a nice long soak in the jacquzzi tub. she really needed it cause she spent several hours stuff in a suitcase on the way to the Bahamas. She's a good puppy and didn't complain much..she was just so happy to go on vacation.

After a long hot day, spending time at the pool and the beach, and walking around Port Lucaya...Puppy was usually pretty tired and loved to sleep on the big bed.

Puppy loved to find a place in the shade to keep cool when it got really hot. Here she is in her hideout outside of our room.

One of her favorite places to go was to the pool and just relax in the sun or swing in the hammock under some palm trees. And when she got really hot she enjoyed jumping in the pool and going down the waterslide. So puppy had a great time in the Bahamas and would loved to go again someday. I think it's her favorite place she's been so far.

I saw it!!!

I saw "Prince Caspian" last night!!!! I went with my roomies. I loved it and thought it was really good. They had some great new characters. But the movie was more violent then the last one, and had one scene involving the White Witch that really freaked me out.( think it would scare young kids)..i had to look away. I don't want to say too much about the movie because i don't want to give away anything for those of you who haven't seen it yet. Overall it was definately worth seeing.

Bahamas here i come!!

So this time tomorrow..i'll be on a plane headed to the Bahamas. I'm so super excited...I've never been before. My mom is taking me and we'll be there for a week...actually 7 nights and 8 days. I can't believe that we're going to be there that long....wahoo!!! So i'm not sure if i'll be posting while i'm there cause i don't know what the internet/wireless setup there is like...so we'll see. I do plan on writing while i'm there so i'll definately be posting more when i get back.

Oh by the way about the Smoothie Contest that i want to enter....i'm having a hard time with their website so i'm not sure if i'll be able to enter or not. I tried yesterday and submitted my entry but it kept saying that there was some kind of mistake..so i'm tried again like 20 more times and it still did the same thing. So i'm going to give it one last shot today..i think the deadline is the 25th or something. Hopefully this time it will work.

Still awake

Well it's a little after 1am and I'm still awake. The question is why in the world am i still awake??? The past few nights i've been having a hard time sleeping. Last night i didn't fall asleep till around 3am. Most of the time it's because im in some kind of pain but tonight i'm actually feeling okay. I'm wide awake so i'm hopeing that writing this blog will make me sleepy.

This week has been a calm semi boring week. I'm been trying to get ready for my vacation ...im leaving on sunday for the Bahamas. My mom is taking me and we're going to be there for a whole week. I'm so super excited! So to get ready for the trip, my mom's been taking me shopping and i've gotten some new clothes and stuff. And tomorrow i'm going for a manicure and a pedicure...wahoo!

So like i said i'm sooooooo excited about this vacation. I can't wait to escape reality for awhile and relax. To be real honest i'm really drained from dealing with everything that has been going on in my life. I really need this vacation.

Need some help please!!

Well i said that i would be posting more and haven't yet...so here's some news. I'm going to be entering " The Ultimate Smoothie Recipe" Contest that Marthastewart.com and The Why Milk Campaign are running. There's a grand prize of $1,000 and a few other prizes that include a really fancy blender. So i need some help with nameing my smoothie. The one i'm entering has every kind of berry there is (strawberries, rasperberries, bluberries, blackberries), Pina Colada Juice, and of course milk...that's not all the ingredients...I don't want to give away my recipe. So if anyone has any suggestions please feel free to let me know. Thanks!

I'm back again...

Well sometime last month i decided that i was going to start blogging again... but life has been full with adventure around every turn...so i haven't made the time to write.  And not having a working laptop didn't help much either. But now thanks to my dad, i have a new laptop and will hopefully be posting more often. 

I'm back!!

It's been an awful long time since I've wrote on this blog, so i thought i would start writing again.

Theme Song

I've discovered another song that describes my life and the way i feel about it right now. So it's now my new theme song! If you want to hear it you can go to my myspace..www.myspace.com/gracefulprincess.

The cool thing about this song is that it reinforces what one of my leaders told me the other day. We were talking about my current situation and he said that I amaze him because i've been through more stuff then anyone he knew and yet i'm still standing.

Here are the lyrics:

all my hopes and dreams inside
visions lurk behind my eyes
something new behind it grows
and You smile as my heart knows
to be another still with You
I'm the one that loved You through
but I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still ntohing next to You
what I've seen and where I've been
what's breaking out and breaking in
who I love and I despise
melting into compromise
how I've changed and how I've learned
becoming less becoming more
and I'm still nothing next to you
I'm still nothing next to you

the sickness my mind's battled long
the center of my every song
the beauty of my voice it fades
into a spiritual cascade
flowing form Your perfect smile
I've avoided all the while
but I'm still nothing next to you
I'm still nothing next to you
all the future seems unclear
never moving never near
but You hold me as I scream
wake me from my wicked dream
something out there waits for me
hand in hand we wait for it
but I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing without to You

and the wonder of it all is I'm still standing
and the wonder of it all is we're still standing
never planned it
and I wonder where I'll be next year

will You stand right next to me
will You hold me faithfully
should I question all these things
what makes me so deserving
of something that I've thrown away
coming back for me today
when I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing next to You
hearts are broken just to mend
when will my brokenness end
lending my mind to dreams it seems
some things are never meant to be
but faith it lingers as I die
inside surrending I cry
I'm still nothing next to You
I'm still nothing without You

time is a broken dream
time is and endless change
time is and offering
time has and endless sting
time has a world to bring
time, it's a broken dream
mended while lovers sing
(Wonder of it All by Monday Morning)

What's Next???

The last few weeks have been full of excitment which has now turned to chaos and confusion. Last week the disability finally went through (thank the Lord) but this week i got a letter from Social Security saying that they're canceling my SSI because i'm on disability. And to make matters much worse i got a letter yesterday from Medicaid saying that they might cancel the medicaid because SSI was canceled.

I'm completey floored right now and confused all at the sametime. God only knows what will happen next.

My Strength

" I don't know what to do

I don't know what to say

All i know is that i love You Lord

And i'm with You all the way



So come, just come Lord to me

So come, just come Lord to me



When my world is caving in

And i'm surrounded by my fears

It is You that i hold onto

It is You that wipes my tears



So come, just come Lord to me

So come, just come Lord to me



I find my strength in quietness and trust

I find my peace in the shadow of the cross"

(My Strength by Adam Miller)



Well it's been another rough week, and honestly at this point i don't know how much more of this i can take. I'm so frustrated and fed up with being sick. I want my life to be normal again!!!! I started to black out at Bath&Body Works today while i was waiting in line. I was really shakey and just started to collaspe.. it scared my mom half to death as well as myself. I just don't know what to do anymore... and when it comes to praying i've been speechless cause i'm just so frustrated. How can i keep fighting this when i just don't have the strength anymore? I get to this point alot or at least it seems like i do, and i always push myself to not give in and give up. But what do you do when you're at the point where you can't push yourself anymore? Sorry to sound so down or whatever you want to call it, but i can't keep acting like i'm doing fine cause i'm not right now. I really need God to move in my life.. something's gotta happen soon.

Sleep is a wonderful thing

Well i had a great post i wanted to post on my xanga but for some reason they're having techinical difficulties, so i'm posting it here first. i've come to another exciting conclusion and want to share it with the rest of the world.. Sleep is a wonderful thing!! Over the past few days i've been getting some good sleep.. the kind where you wake up refreshed instead of feeling exhausted like you never went to sleep (thats how i normally feel). I consider myself lucky when i can get a few hours of sleep a night. So being able to sleep 5 hours straight in a row and then wake up and go back to sleep for a few more hours, and still wake up feeling good, has been a tremendous blessing. I'm really enjoying this, i don't know how long it'll last. It's amazing how much of a difference getting some good sleep really makes. I love sleeping now!!