Not Enough Time

Well i come to the conclusion that there is way too many things to do and not enough time to do them. And even though there's not enough i still have to do everything. AHHHH!!!! So you may be wondering why i'm posting something when i have so much to do. Well I'm taking a break because if i don't i'll go crazy. I don't think i'll actually go crazy, i just probably scream and get frustrated.

I found out on Friday that i have to have my room all packed and ready to go, by you guessed it, tomorrow. So friday i sorta paniced because i didn't have a place to move yet. But just then A wonderful lady called me, Sherry Desloge and asked if i wanted to move in with them. So it was perfect timing!! And God came through for me once again, He's so faithful!!

So in about 3 hours, my sister had my room halfway packed. I couldn't do much cause i can't lift anything,so i just told her want i wanted to bring and helped sort things out. but that still made me tired and my brain felt like it was on over load. I'm really packing for 3 things at the sametime. I'm going to be in concord till tues morning. then i'll come back to the house for a day, and then I'm going to Nj with my mom to go through my stuff at my old house. And I'll be gone for a week. And when i come back I'll move in with the Desloges. So I am kinda stressed right now, even though things are working out and will be alright. Like i said there is just so many things to do and not enough time to do it all. So Lord please help me!!!

Everything

" Find me here, and speak to me
I want to feel, I need to hear you
You are the light that's leading me
To the place, where I find peace

You are my strength that keeps me walking
You are the hope that keeps trusting
You are the light to my soul
You are my purpose you're everything

And how can I stand here with You and not be moved by You
Would You tell me how could it be, any better then this

You calm the storm and gives me rest
You hold me in Your hands, You won't let me fall
You still my heart and You take my breath away
Would you take me in, would me deeper now

Cause You're all I want
You're all I need
You're everything, everything

(Everything by LifeHouse)

Faith

Today has been a long day and I've kept myself very busy between trying to find missing grads and now i'm working on stuff for youth. But even though i was busy i took a break and played, Uno with Riley (6 yr old nephew). He loves to win and doesn't like it when he loses, so we played alot of rounds of Uno, so he could win. I haven't had alot of time to post stuff lately, so we'll try again later. But i did come across this quote from Max Lucado about faith. It's really cool, here it is

" Faith is a desperate dive out of the sinking boat of human effort and a prayer that God will be there to pull us out of the water"

That one quote basically describes how situations in my life are right now. God's gotta come through for me right now.

Busy.. Busy.. Busy

Hello everyone! Sorry that it's been a few days since i posted anything new on here. the last few days have been a blur cause it's been so busy. Well this past weekend was gradutation at FIRE, so i went to that and then we ( AMT) threw a graduation party for the grads. It went well and there was ALOT of people!!! So that was a late night for me. Then sunday was non eventful, i rested alot to make up for my lack of sleep. And today I'm helping out at the FIRe offices and will probably be doing the same thing tomorrow.

So that's about it for now. I'm not in the mood for writing a creative post. And i'm not feeling the greatest right now so i should get off this comupter before i start feeling worse.

Extremely Frustrated!

Well right now I'm extremely frustrated!!!!! Actually if there's something beyond frustration, then that would better explain how I'm feeling right now. I'm having one of those days where all of my limitations and the things i can't do, are staring me in the face. And i really would like to scream right now, but Reagan is trying to take a nap so i can't do that(at least he's suppose to be, but i've heard him playing in his room instead). so writing this post will have to do for now.

I really wish i could drive again then i wouldn't be so frustrated. Alot of my frustration right now has to do with the fact that i can't drive, and i was planning on going somewhere today but still don't know if that's going to work out. This depending on people is not working right now. Don't get me wrong, i'm thankful and grateful for all of my friends who have helped me get back and forth to places, but it's days like today that mess with me.

I miss driving so much!! I'm so used to just jumping in my car and driving where ever i want. And now i can;t do that anymore. It's quite boring being stuck at the house all the time. That's what usually happens when i'm here during the week. If i'm with my friends in concord then i can get around easier. Right now i'm just stuck, still trying to figure out if i'll be able to get to the graduation today and the grad party that we're (AMT) throwing for the grads tonight. I really want to be there for that, not just becuase i'm part of AMT but cause i want to spend time with the new grads.

Well i better end this for now. I could babble on forever but i better not.

Today

Today's been an uneventful day, at least so far. For most of the day I've been feeling sick but i guess it's from the new medicine i started today. Thankfully i don't have a miagrian today!!! I hope it won't take long to adjust to all this new medication.

I haven't gotten alot done today. Good thing is that there's not much for me to do, so i can take some time and rest since i'm not feeling good. So far i've done laundry, laid down for awhile and watched the Cosby show, then i checked my email, then i watched part of 'ELF", and then i went upstairs to work on my ongoing project. I've made an "Encouragement Book' for myself. I've printed out scriptures, songs, and emails from my friends and leaders, that have really helped me through this difficult season i've been in. So when i have my times when i feel all alone or start to get hopeless i can look through my encouragement book.

Well that's all for now, i've got to get ready for church tonight!

Trail Mix

Well this post is going to be about trail mix. I'll probably write a more serious post lately, i'm not really in the mood now. for those of you who don't like trail mix just bare with me. I finally found the perfect trail mix. My long search is over, yeah!!! All the other trail mixes have almonds and other strange nuts i don't like, but this one i found doesn't. Chex Mix has a trail mix out that is awesome! It doesn't have almonds, but has peanuts, chex mix, rasins, candy pieces,and pretzels. It's so perfect that i can even eat it when i'm not feeling good. so it's my comfort food.

Crazy day

Well yesterday was another crazy day. Seems like my life has been extremely crazy latey, more like insane. Yesterday started off okay, i went to the Fire office had a good talk with one of my leaders. Then my mom picked me up, and i went with her to look for a new trailer/camper. They have one now but want to upgrade it becuase it's pretty old. Anyway we were out in the hot sun for a couple hours, and that started to make me sick. And that's when i started getting another miagrain. Well then we went to get something to eat, hopeing it would help me. But it didn't, i just kept feeling worse. So we went to the Er to get my second to last rabie shot ( i still have one left.). And i figure since i was already at the er that i would mention the miagrain i had so i could get some medicine for it. Well we were at the er till 8pm, about six hours. they ended up giving me an iv with narcotics to get rid of the headache. That's what they had to do last time.

The good news is that i went to my dr today about the miagrains. And i now have medicine i can take at home, so i don't have to go to the er when i get a miagrain. I have something to take when i'm nausace, something to take everyday to prevent them, and then something to take during the miagrain. so things should be ok soon hopefully.

Well that's it for now! I'll write another post later.

What was I thinking??

Well yesterday i had a very exciting day! Since the last few weeks (actually much longer then that) have been rough(a major understatment), my mom who's in town for the week treated us to a day at Carowinds. It was so much fun and i loved it! And for once i was almost able to forget about all my problems.

Yesterday was the perfect day to go to Carowinds. It started out really cloudy and yucky looking but ended up being very sunny and HOT! Forunately there is a waterpark there and alot of the other rides get you wet, so you can stay cool. But Since we were outside all day in the sun, i got fried. And believe it or not i wore sunscreen and a hat for part of the day. I got burnt everywhere including my scalp. Actually normally my scalp is the first place i burn cause my hair is so thin.

I think the sun actually fried part of my brain becuase i went on ride that i should of never gotten on. I don't know what i was thinking, and i don't know why i let my brother in law talk me into it. There's this ride at the waterpark part, called "Pipeline Plunge" Those of you who have been to Carowinds should know what i'm talking about, but i'll try to describe it for those of you who haven't been there. It's a five story tall water slide, that's a curvy sprial pipe. And you go down on your back with your hands behind your head and ankles crossed. Well it didn't hit me what i was actually about to do, till i started going down the pipe, then i paniced and thought i was going to have a heart attack or drown before i got to the bottom. First of all when you're going down this pipe there is tons of water that is thrown at your face and all around you, but your hands are suppose to be behind your head, so you can't hold you nose, that' why i thought i would surely drown. Secondly I'm so light that my body wouldn't just stay on the bottom of the pipe, but i kept going up on the sides of the pipe. Thirdly, you're traveling at least 30 miles an hour. Fourthly, it's completely black no light till you reach the end.

So i literally thought i would surely die, i was so scared!! Well after i recovered from that ride, i went on a roller coaster. This was a mild rollercoaster. It's cool cause there are these huge water guns on the ground that people watching you can use to soak you with water. But while you're riding you can also dump water on unexpecting people who are just walking around and have no idea what;s going on. It's a lot a fun.

So i really had a great day! And i could of stayed there forever, especially at the water park part of it cause they had a nice relaxing wave pool that i enjoyed very much.

So that was my day yesterday. Today i'm purposely not doing anything but trying to get some much needed rest cause of yesterday. I really wore myself out and did somethings i shouldn't of done cause of my heart. But i think it was worth it even though i'm feeling quite yucky right now.

Late start

I just woke up! I've been awake for about an hour. I'm definately not a morning person. during the week when i'm at my sister's house, i don't have a lot to do. so i can sleep as much as i want to. It's good becuase there are nights when i don't sleep well, or can't fall asleep to after 1am. Then there are the times when i'm not feeling good or in pain and can't sleep at all. Oh well, enough of my babbling. I'm just glad i can sleep in when i need to.

since i was still feeling pretty good yesterday, i wanted to go the pool and relax a bit. This was the first time this summer that i've been able to go. My sister and the boys go all the time, and most of the times they've gone i've been sick. Normally i can't be outside for long when if it's hot, it makes me feel worse or i'll get a miagrain. So anyway we went up to the pool yesterday. It was hot but cloudy so the sun wasn't beating down on me. As soon as i got in the water it started raining. Then a few minutes later it thundered, and the life guard had everyone get out of the water. And then it thunderstormed. To make a long story short we packed up everything and went home. Maybe I'll try again and go to the pool today. We'll see.

Another Er Adventure

Yesterday I had another adventure at the ER. This time i had a severe miagrain. I woke up feeling ok so Christy and I went to the FIRE office. And i helped her with some alumni stuff and got alot of things done. Well within a few hours the miagrian came back and was really bad. So Christy took me back to her house and as soon as she left i started throwing up. And i couldn't stop, it was super yucky!! I'll spare you the details. Well my mom was in town so i called her and she decided to pick up and take me to the er becuase the pain was unbearable and it wasn't getting any better.

So we got to the Er and they got me back to a room right away. They gave me two narcotics plus another medicine through an iv. And eventually i was feeling much better. The medicines knocked me out for a couple hours so i stayed in the er for awhile. I'm still pretty out of it but i feel so good right now. I'm not in any pain and haven't been in pain since yesterday. I haven't felt this good in quite a long time. It's so crazy what a difference a day can make.

Remember

The other night at church the message really got me thinking. The message was about not forgetting the Lord and how we need to remember what He's done for us. Something that was said, was that we tend to forget the Lord even when everything is going good. My problem is sorta the opposite, i tend to forget the Lord when going through diffcult times of my life. Honestly nothing has been going good for a few years now. i've gone through more valleys and battles then victories. And when i'm going through times like that i start to lose sight of God's faithfulness and everything He's done for me. So i'm trying to be more diligent to remember the Lord. There's such a confidence, hope, and rest, when i remember what God has done for me and how faithful He's been to me.

Bats.. Bats...Bats

I was able to go back to the house on thursday. My sister called me that day to tell me all the details about what had happened. I think it's a good to know why the bats got in, don't you? Well my sister and brother in law are in the process of redoing the kitchen. And awhile ago they took down the kitchen cabinets that were over the stove. And it left a square hole in the ceiling. so my brother in law put a big wooden block up there to close it off. well that still left a small part of the hole open, small enough for a bat to squeeze through. so the bats were coming in through the eves on the side of the house and then getting through this hole in the ceiling. there were 3 bats that actually got in the house, and 30 bats that are still in the eves. So we have a mini colony still alive and well in the eves of the house. Which brings me to the reason why they're still alive, cause if i had it my way the bats would be dead by now. Bats are under federal protection becuase they eat insects, so you're not allowed to kill them. I really think that this is really stupid. And that once the bats cross the line and enter your house and or are in your roof and could get in your house, you should be able to get rid of them, even if it means killing them.So what is going to happen now, is in a few weeks the bat people will come back and put a screen where the bats are. So the bats will be able to leave but won't be able to get back in. But this cost about $1,000.

i'm still pretty paranoid, and havent' slept well since i've been back. but now i'm at my friend's house for a few nights. so will hopefully sleep better while i'm here. by the way i just want to say thank you to Christy, Sarah, and the rest of the girls at Alpha Crowded. Thanks for opening your home and letting me stay here when i need to. you've all have really blessed me so much!

Well i guess that's about it for now!

Gratitude

"Send some rain,would You send some rain?
Cause the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade
Would you send a cloud, thunder long and loud?
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid
But maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case..

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If You never send us rain

Daily bread, give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups and fill them up again tonight
Wrap us up and warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy roofs
Let us slumber safe from danger's view this time
But maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead
And if we never taste that bread

Oh the differences that often are between
Everything we want and what we really need

So grant us peace, Jesus grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight
Or maybe not, not today
Peace might be another world away
And if that's the case

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if you never grant us peace

But Jesus would You please..

(Gratitude by Nichole Nordeman)

It's raining!!

It's storming really bad right now. The rain is coming down so hard, plus it's windy so the wind is blowing it. I'm glad I'm inside, nice and dry. And i'm glad i'm not driving somewhere cuase it looks like you probably wouldn't be able to see well.

Today has been surprisely productive, inspite of how i'm feeling right now. I'm very sore from the rabie shots still. My arms and legs feel like lead, and i'm just in a lot of pain. I can walk around better today but i still can't walk upstairs yet. It's amazing to me that these shots can do this much to your body

Well like i said inspite of all that, i got alot done today. I went with my wonderful friend Christy to the FIRE office and helped her with some projects. And the first thing i got to do was create a power point. I've used power point before but not since high school. so i don't remember much about it but i did it. And it looks really cool!! So that's what i did today, it basically took up the whole day but it's done!!

I need ice

Well this morning i went to the er once again. This will be my 3rd trip to the er in just over a week. And it's my 6th trip to the hospital in the last few months. I had to have the rabie shots done after all, plus since i haven't had a tentus shot in a very long time, they decided to do that one too. So right now i'm in alot of pain and am extremely sore. I need to get some ice soon. I just really feel weird right now.

Well on a lighter note, after we were done at the ER.MY friend Jen and I went to Red Robin. It's a new resturant that just open this week. there are red robins in the north where i'm from, so i haven't been to one in a while. I loved it!! It's a really cool place and the food is great. Both of us were straving cause we hadn't had anything to eat yet, and by the time we got to the restruant it was going on 3pm. We both had "Freckled Lemonade", which is lemonade with real strawberries in it. and i got some kind of italian chicken sandwhich. It was messy but good!

So that was my adventure for today! Wonder what will happen tomorrow?

I'm Not a Morning Person

Well it's days like today that i realize that i am not a morning person. Now i can make myself be a morning person if i have to , but this morning is not one of those times.

I was at the ER again last night till after 2 in the morning, and i had to get up at 7:30 this morning. this time i had to go to the er becuase i was told i had to have rabie shots. Remember the bat i wrote about in the last post? Well not only is there one stuck in the window but we found two more in the house. When my sister came home on saturday night from watching fireworks, there to greet her was a bat on the living room floor. And as that wasn't bad enough she went into the kitchen and there was another bat on the kitchen floor. So that makes a total of 3 bats in the house!!!! YUCK, EXTREMELY YUCKY!! Well all of this was going on while i was upstairs getting ready to go to bed. Well obviously we had to stay at a friends house that night. there was no way i was going to sleep in the house with the bats.

Anyway the next day i went out with a friend and my mom called to tell me that the health department went to the house and told Sarah, my sister that everyone living in the house has to have rabie shots. Well i wasn't too happy about that so i put it off as long as i could. Well we finally went to the ER around midnight and the dr's told me there that i don't have to get the shots!!! So i got out of it! Thank you Jesus!

A Bat and a Turtle

Life around this house has been interesting lately to say the least. Last night as my sister was working on the backyard, she found a turtle. So she wanted to keep it for the boys. It's now in a big plastic box on my back porch. Riley has named it Terry the turtle. The boys love it, and i don't mind it. Actually it's really funny to watch it. When i first saw him this morning, he was trying to get out of the box. He kept trying so hard to climb but despite his effort it wasn't working. After he tried for awhile he would stop for a moment, and look upand around, as if he were thinking about another way to get out of the box. Then he would start trying to get out again. This turtle is a very determined turtle, he is still trying to escape and he hasn't given up yet.

Well a little while i made a discovery. I discovered that there is a bat hanging upside down in the dining room window. The bat is small but he is still a bat. I am very close to freaking out right now!! First of all how did this bat get in the window? Where did he come from? And most importantly, will he stay in the window or will he get in the house? Right now the bat is sleeping, hanging upside down but what happens when he wakes up? I will really freak out if he gets in the house.